Just So Stories

Simon & Schuster Australia

• Publisher: Gallery UK
• October 2025
• ISBN13: 9781398548053

I have always loved Bob Mortimer on WILTY, which I admit is the only place I’ve seen his comedy. I didn’t realise he was also a writer until I spotted this one in a publicity email and immediately was keen to read it. I mean, anyone who can spin the outrageous yarns that man does so convincingly when they are not true, or so unbelievable when they are, has a gift for telling a story.

And given his already well-established track record over the past few years and with this gem, I will be searching out more, because this was a cracker of a book! I’m not entirely sure how to pigeon-hole it into a genre so I won’t but it is mystery, drama, satire, humour, noir fiction with a touch of romance. Does that help?

Matt Giles is an average sort of bloke. He’s very unambitious, and always has been. He’s been unemployed for some time, but cruising along on his severance pay, which was substantial enough to keep him for months. He’s been living with his girlfriend, Harriet, for a couple of years now. She’s a very successful and dynamic professional, working for the Crown Prosecutor’s Office – currently on a huge fraud and money laundering case.

Matt is supposed to be looking for a new rental for the couple but seems to spend more time doing – well, basically not a lot. A bit of housework, a bit of cooking, a bit of a morning walk and coffee, mooching with his much-loved cat Goodmonsn (who takes cat sarcasm to a whole new level) and a lot of TV watching. He wants to find the perfect place for them both, especially when he wakes up one morning and Harriet appears to have taken off. Has she left him? Where has she gone? What can he do to get her back? He’s feeling desperate because she’s not even responding to any calls or texts.

And their neighbour is no help. She’s a cougar with a mission – and that mission is stealing Matt. Not to keep him, just to prove she can.

Enter a rather suspicious but extremely wealthy man, offering Matt the perfect (it would seem) job – a little ‘caretaking’ at his swanky apartment block, in exchange for the unit of Harriet’s dreams for a minimal rent. Trouble is that the caretaking turns out to be surveillance of the other occupants, one of whom is a beefy Yorkshire crim and the other a pretty psycho yoga instructor. Turns out the crim is the better friend to have.

As Matt tries to navigate this new arrangement and still is desperate to work out how to salvage his possibly derailed relationship, the parallel plot line informs the reader that Harriet is, in fact, being held captive by person or persons unknown. Right up to the crunch and wicked twist, the reader is unprepared for the denouement – and then OH!!!!!

Frankly, it was loads of fun. One can’t help liking Matt, who really is a hapless klutz of a character – though I certainly wouldn’t like to live with him! Harriet becomes a warmer, more understanding, and understandable character as her story unfolds. And rapacious Carol, the next-door neighbour is so over-the-top as to be hilarious.

I am so glad I asked for this one [thanks S&S] because now I have several more to get my hands on and enjoy. When you have some spare time check out some of Bob’s legion of hilarious episodes on WILTY. This gets a very long and pointed 5 👞👞👞👞👞rating mostly for adult readers, but only if they have a good sense of absurd humour.